The Fifth Pallbearer - This is a departure from my regular blogs and I am looking for feedback
The Fifth Pallbearer
Paul receives a call to come to the hospital from his close but not recently seen friend, John. John’s voice was so strong when he called that he couldn’t believe what he saw when he entered the hospital room. John is hooked up to so many machines he is barely visible. Paul is surprised that his friend’s situation is so dire. He knew John had been sick for several years but since he had not kept in regular communication with him, he didn’t know that he was on the verge of succumbing to his illness.
John is in good spirits when Paul enters his room and loudly welcomes him. It seems like no time has passed since their last visit. Time apart is different when you truly know a person over a lifetime. The meetings always seem like you only saw the person yesterday and catching up with each other is fun.
After catching up on each other’s lives, John gets a serious look on his face. It’s not that Paul hasn’t seen this look from time to time when discussing something serious but the sudden change startles him - not visibly, but internally.
John tells Paul that tomorrow he is being placed in hospice care. All of his treatment has helped but nothing further can be done. He has a relatively short time left on this earth and asks Paul to be one of his pallbearers. Paul tells John that he is in no shape to lift a coffin. He, too, is less than well - not from illness, but from simply not taking good care of his health through diet and exercise.
John insists that his good friend needs to help him get to the grave. After a few seconds pass, Paul sees how important it is to John and accepts his request. After a few more conversations about life, Paul bids goodbye to John and heads home.
On the way home, Paul considers the obligation he just agreed to and realizes that if he is to be a pallbearer for his good friend, he has quite the task ahead of him: getting in good enough shape to lift a coffin without injury or embarrassment. He knows that when anyone is placed in hospice care they are usually not long for this earth, so he needs to get started.
Paul needs a game plan. He needs a meal plan and an exercise program. He heads to the Internet for inspiration and information. Paul has to start exercising slowly because just walking any distance in a store tires him out. He decides to start his exercise routine by taking walks in his home. Next, he decides that although he isn’t concerned about his weight, he is worried about his health. In that vein, he decides to make better choices with his meals. Rather than eating fast food for convenience, he learns to cook a few dishes that incorporate whole foods. Again, he knows he has precious little time to get in better shape.
Paul decides to begin his days with 10-minute walks around his house and a light breakfast. As the days pass, he decides he should include resistance training to gain strength in his arms. He begins arm exercises using a small set of weights that belonged to his ex-wife. He has extreme difficulty but as the days go by, he notices that his endurance is improving. He can now walk for 20 minutes without assistance. He is ready to move outside onto uneven ground and multiple surfaces. He exercises his arms while walking outdoors to kill two birds with one stone. He feels a sense of urgency and every day looks to hear that John has passed away. Every day he ups his exercise regime and consumes mainly whole foods. After three weeks pass, he feels better and is optimistic that he can fulfill his obligation to be a pallbearer for his friend.
In addition to implementing exercise and healthy eating, Paul decides he needs a new suit and sets out around town to find one with a good fit and a good price tag. He settles on a blue suit, white shirt, and blue necktie. Blue is John’s favorite color. John has never said out loud that blue is his favorite color, but all the walls in his house are painted blue and his furniture and kitchen cabinets are also blue. Paul chooses a blue tie with small red stripes as a nice touch and an ode to his friend. He will represent his friend well in this new outfit. He decides his current dress shoes will be okay because he only wears them on special occasions, so they are barely worn. A good polish will set them in good standing.
Several more weeks pass with no phone call and Paul gets healthier and stronger every week.
Late on a Tuesday morning, close to lunchtime, Paul’s phone rings with the awful news that John passed away overnight. Paul is ready. When details of the funeral service arrive via text, he presses his new shirt and polishes his shoes. On the day of the funeral, he suits up and heads to the church. It is downtown and one he and John both attended as kids.
Upon arrival at the church, Paul is ushered into a small side chapel along with the other five pallbearers and receives his boutonniere and instructions on how to lift the coffin. The flower in the boutonniere is a small blue hydrangea surrounded by a small bit of green foliage. It is beautiful and looks perfect with Paul’s blue tie. John would have loved it. The other pallbearers are John’s grandsons. Learning this information, Paul feels even more honored to be part of the service.
John’s funeral is moving and reminds Paul how generous and kind his friend was. One story in particular stands out to Paul. The speaker, John’s wife, Lilly, discusses being newlyweds and purchasing their home. She talks about loving flowers and how having flower arrangements in their home makes her happy. John knew that flowers were important to Lilly, but they were barely living paycheck to paycheck then, so purchasing flowers every week just didn’t fit into their budget. John, determined to fulfill this one request of his new wife’s, purchased one blue hydrangea plant and over the next several seasons planted cuttings from it to start new hydrangea plants all over their yard. Over the next few years, their yard becomes a sea of blue hydrangeas that look like waves of the ocean when the wind blows. Lilly, and all who have seen their home, smile at this act of true love.
After the service, it’s showtime for Paul. He does not disappoint, moving with grace and strength, and not even flinching at the heaviness of the coffin. He and the other pallbearers navigate the steps of the funeral home and easily place the coffin in the hearse. He does not falter while carrying his share of the coffin over the slippery grass and uneven ground at the graveside. John would be proud of him.
On the way home, Paul thinks about how the past few weeks have changed everything. John is gone but thanks to him, Paul is in better shape than he has been in the past few years. At this moment, Paul realizes that, after speaking with John just before he was placed in hospice care, he had not spoken with him again.
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